It amazes me how sometimes being away from school only makes it more apparent the issues I have when I'm at school because I've realized what the normal world is like. Yup, that was a really vague sentence. I'll clarify. I go to school at a private Christian liberal arts university. Most of the population at our school are nice Christian kids. Because of the nature of this school, there are a few strange things that have popped up and stuck around, most notably, Ring-by-Spring, and the SPU Bubble.
Ring-by-Spring is always a heavily argued topic because people swear that it's not really there any more, and that our generation has moved beyond it. (For those who don't know, Ring-by-Spring references a Christian college culture where you should find your life partner and be engaged to them by the time you get to the spring of your senior year) The hilarious thing to me about this mentality is that every holiday season, and every spring, people left and right start getting engaged. *shrug* Perhaps it's just a strange reality.
Now the SPU Bubble, that's a harder one for me to just shrug off. What this refers to is the sheltered community that is set up at SPU, where all things are lovely and beautiful, full of God, and without dissent. Most everyone seems to be conservative Republicans, and evangelical Christians, ready to share the gospel with everyone around them. (Please note that I said seems, not is) I've now been here for four years, and I'm about ready to kick the next person who posts a Bible verse as a status, or talk constantly about all the work God is doing in their lives.
Now don't get me wrong, I'm not stupid enough to run around telling people that their faith isn't important, or that it's all BS. I don't think that any faith crisis that I'm having should keep other people from their own faith, and I also understand that we have a freedom to openly talk about our faith. What kills me in these situations is how often the people who post things like that are in fact the ones being total jerks to people around them. If you're posting about how God is teaching you how to put Him front and center, that's awesome. But don't turn around and be a jerk to someone who just read that status. Because, let's just be frank, that's the very hypocritical behavior that non-Christians judge Christians for.
I hate saying it, too, because people assume that Christians should have it all figured out, and be perfect like they say they are. I know that it's not true. But I wonder...the best Christians I've seen in my life are the ones who are openly imperfect. They may cuss, or drink, or just openly state that they have no effing idea where they're going in life, but that they're trying to figure out their relationship with God as they go. People in my life who are like this, thank you. Out of all the types of people I've met at SPU, these people are the ones who have helped me maintain any semblance of faith. The ones who are constantly gushing about God are the ones I'm actually more likely to raise an eyebrow at, and get much more miffed if they turn around and bite my head off when they're stressed (which, strangely enough, has happened a lot over the last few years. What's up with that?).
I also worry very much about the kids I know who are in the SPU Bubble, because I wonder what is going to happen to them after they graduate. The first time they get in an argument with someone, and that someone isn't just going to say, "Oh honey, God wants me to forgive you, so I will!" Or the first time they bite someone else's head off, and the other person isn't thinking to themselves, "You know, I'm sure they're having a hard week with school, so I'll just let it pass that they just hurt me, and go pray for them instead." Nope, in the real world, people get pissed about behavior like that. I hope things go well for the kids that don't leave the Bubble until graduation, but I'm rather glad that I'm hanging out off to the side of the Bubble instead.
I want to be a good Christian, but sometimes, I think it's easier to try to just be a Christian, and not worry about being that crazy conservative Christian, Republican, soft-spoken, cookie-baking, Sunday school teaching, super-mom, pastor's wife that seems to be the ideal. I find I have a better time with my faith when it's okay that I'm loud, and sarcastic, a musician who can't decide if they even want kids, and someone who probably slips up with cuss words far too much for anyone else's comfort zone. I don't pray enough, or read my Bible, but I do try to have a relationship with God. I probably screw it up more than I get it right, but I'll keep trying until I can no longer do so. Having a faith crisis while at a Christian school is probably a bit weird, but then again, maybe not.
~Allison
Saturday, December 22, 2012
Sunday, December 16, 2012
Memories
It's amazing to me how soon the most exciting events begin to fade into hazy memories. How soon you can't remember if the time you played wii golf and tried to keep the gigantic golden retriever from attacking the wii-mote was on your 19th or 20th birthday. How very quickly you begin to wonder what memories you share with your friends and family that are really special.
Okay, a brief interlude here to get everyone out there on the same page as I am. It's rainy in Seattle...not drizzle-y like usual, but actually rainy. I've been working like crazy, and have spent a lot of days by myself, doing some interesting self-reflection. I sometimes wonder if I'm a bit crazy, but I actually enjoy these thoughts, even if sometimes they cause a bit of a twinge in my chest. Nonetheless, they aren't always happy thoughts, and if I'm not careful, they have been known to slowly spiral downwards and make me depressed. Rather than let the thought of memories and their significance spiral, I decided it would be a nice change to share some of this reflection with my closest friends and family (I consider you to be if you're reading this because you are taking your time to share something with me...and I'm incredibly honored by that).
So, back to that thought about memories...sometimes I wonder if I should have spent more time doing things that are memorable, or perhaps the real question is this: What have I done to maintain friendships with those people who have been there for some of the biggest moments in my life?
As I've gotten older, I've begun to really cherish the friends I have. The main group of friends that I've made since I've come to college create a group of people that I hope to always keep in contact with. As I come closer to graduation, however, I've begun to worry that I'll repeat my actions of the past, and just shut myself off from those wonderful people with the excuse of moving forward in my life.
I'm jealous of those people around me who go home and hang out with their old high school friends. Reminiscing about the past, talking excitedly about what their future holds, and just generally sharing in an ongoing friendship. I'll be the first to admit that I didn't really try to maintain friendships, and have hardly gone home since I left for college over four years ago. But when I see my friends posting pictures of fun parties, or sharing memories from awesome trips they took, that twinge in my chest occurs, and I wonder if I'm missing out. If I've incidentally messed something up because I don't have things like that to share with my friends. Does facebook count as maintaining friendships? Because part of me definitely feels like it's a hollow excuse for being connected to others.
This may be one of the rare occasions I ask for comments from you guys. Do you have any fantastic memories that stand out between you and I? Or you know, a moment where I opened my mouth and said something stupid and we laughed about it forever(I KNOW you guys all have memories like this).
Merry almost Christmas, guys. I hope you're having a fantastic holiday season, and enjoying the time to spend with friends and family!
~Allison
Okay, a brief interlude here to get everyone out there on the same page as I am. It's rainy in Seattle...not drizzle-y like usual, but actually rainy. I've been working like crazy, and have spent a lot of days by myself, doing some interesting self-reflection. I sometimes wonder if I'm a bit crazy, but I actually enjoy these thoughts, even if sometimes they cause a bit of a twinge in my chest. Nonetheless, they aren't always happy thoughts, and if I'm not careful, they have been known to slowly spiral downwards and make me depressed. Rather than let the thought of memories and their significance spiral, I decided it would be a nice change to share some of this reflection with my closest friends and family (I consider you to be if you're reading this because you are taking your time to share something with me...and I'm incredibly honored by that).
So, back to that thought about memories...sometimes I wonder if I should have spent more time doing things that are memorable, or perhaps the real question is this: What have I done to maintain friendships with those people who have been there for some of the biggest moments in my life?
As I've gotten older, I've begun to really cherish the friends I have. The main group of friends that I've made since I've come to college create a group of people that I hope to always keep in contact with. As I come closer to graduation, however, I've begun to worry that I'll repeat my actions of the past, and just shut myself off from those wonderful people with the excuse of moving forward in my life.
I'm jealous of those people around me who go home and hang out with their old high school friends. Reminiscing about the past, talking excitedly about what their future holds, and just generally sharing in an ongoing friendship. I'll be the first to admit that I didn't really try to maintain friendships, and have hardly gone home since I left for college over four years ago. But when I see my friends posting pictures of fun parties, or sharing memories from awesome trips they took, that twinge in my chest occurs, and I wonder if I'm missing out. If I've incidentally messed something up because I don't have things like that to share with my friends. Does facebook count as maintaining friendships? Because part of me definitely feels like it's a hollow excuse for being connected to others.
This may be one of the rare occasions I ask for comments from you guys. Do you have any fantastic memories that stand out between you and I? Or you know, a moment where I opened my mouth and said something stupid and we laughed about it forever(I KNOW you guys all have memories like this).
Merry almost Christmas, guys. I hope you're having a fantastic holiday season, and enjoying the time to spend with friends and family!
~Allison
Saturday, December 8, 2012
A How To for consumers during the holidays!
My dear, wonderful friends. I adore you all. You are all awesome, amazing people, and I hope that none of you have ever done anything I'm about to discuss. But, after nearly five years, and a whole LOT of different jobs in the retail/service industry, we need to have a talk about how to treat those who are serving you.
Before I get into this, I want to remind you of the biggest thing: those people at the cash registers, folding clothes around the stores in the mall, helping you find the cream of tartar in the grocery store, and waiting your tables are PEOPLE. Wonderful, (mostly) hard-working people who are trying to earn money, and do their job well, and often with less than ideal hours.
Issue #1: Please and Thank You
Remember a long, long time ago, when your parents told you that they wouldn't pass you dessert at the table until you said please? And then when they served you, you had to say thank you? This is still totally in effect, even if you're in your 20s and 30s. That waiter who you just stopped to refill your water glass may actually be racing to get an order in for another table so they won't have to wait for an extra 5 minutes for their food. Smile, and say thank you when they bring stuff to you!
Issue #2: Patience
You walk into your favorite coffee shop, and see that the line is to the door. All of the staff is busting their rear ends to get everything done, which doesn't include just making coffee. They're ringing orders, cleaning the seating area, brewing coffee, dumping overflowing garbage cans, retrieving basic items like milk or syrups. People are racing through their orders at the cash register as though the poor person ringing should remember that they want three half-decaf, soy, no-foam, 16 ounce lattes, but make one with an extra shot, one with a pump of vanilla, and one only 165 degrees, EXACTLY.
Sometimes, things slip up. I'm never more appreciative than when customers see that things are crazy, and something slipped, and their drink ended up with whipped cream when they asked for none, and they're actually okay with it! Did you know that if you actually are nice to your barista/waiter/busser/etc. they'll most likely remember you, and therefore work even harder to be nice to you the next time? And if you're nasty, they'll never forget. And you'll probably go down on some list of people that the employee will cringe when they walk in.
Issue #3: Technology
As an owner of an iPhone, I understand the allure of smartphones. So much information at your fingertips! But when you're having a human interaction (ordering food, purchasing clothes, etc.), that little piece of technology needs to go away. Not maybe, not sometimes, but every time. Ordering food for a friend? Have them write down their order for you, and maybe some options in case they don't have what they want. Please don't stand there on the phone with them, discussing every option while you're at the head of the line making others wait and your server trying their hardest not to roll their eyes at you.
Issue #4: Large Parties
You know how a lot of restaurants automatically charge gratuities for parties of 8 or more? There is good reason. Working with a large party of people who all want exactly what they want, which probably won't at all coincide with what everyone else in the group wants, and can you split the check 5 ways, and do you mind if we pull up another table, and we need extra silverware...tip nicely, guys. Which leads me to:
Issue #5: Tipping
Did you know, in many states, servers are paid under minimum wage because their tips make up much of what they earn? Similarly, most servers and people who work in restaurants live more off of the tips they make than they do on their hourly wage. Also, in case you didn't realize, a base minimum tip should be 10% (based off of the amount your dinner cost after tax). Minimum. And that's only if they did a completely wretched job serving you. 10% tells your server that you have decency, but that they need to step up their work. 15% is good if they've done an okay job, but something may have been wrong, or service was slow. 20% should be what you aim to give. They're doing their very best, even in often less than ideal circumstances. Keep this in mind: much of the time, servers don't get to keep all of their tips. Tips can go into a pool with everyone else's tips, and you get the average based on how many hours you worked, or each server gets their own tips, but has to give a certain percentage of those away to their bussers and the kitchen staff. So if you tip 20%, the server may only get 10-15% of those tips.
And finally, I have a special note to those who stuck with me through this blog. Most of you know that I'm a Christian, and a young adult. I want to share with you something important: the two worst types of people for tipping fairly and treating people with respect and dignity are: Christians and young adults. And guys, this is a huge problem.
Think of it this way: You get done with church in the morning, and you and your friends decide to pop into a cafe to get some coffee and maybe a pastry. You're discussing the sermon when the server comes up (or when it's your turn to order), and you spend a while trying to figure out what to order, but instead of asking them to come back, they stand waiting patiently as each of you figure out what you want. (Doesn't seem like a big deal, right?) They bring back your food and coffee, but accidentally switch a plate or two. You sigh, roll your eyes, and switch them back in front of them, continuing your discussion which has now moved to what kind of worship music would have been appropriate for the service today. You forgot to say thank you, or even smile at your server. When they bring your check, you and your friends have to have it split up, so everyone is paying for their own meal. Only one person has cash, and some people have some coins, so altogether, you've left a $3 tip, mostly in change.
That server has been watching you, and listening. When I notice a customer is a Christian, I pay attention to how they act, and how they treat me. And you know that old proverb, "Actions speak louder than words?" It's completely true.
It's terrible to me that I cringe when I have to work Sunday mornings when we have what's called the "church rush." It makes me sad that people don't realize that their treatment of other people will have a huge impact on whether or not their server will ever want to step foot in their church. And by the way, just because I work Sunday mornings does not make me a heathen. I do it because I make money that way, and it fits my schedule.
So please, please be nice this holiday season. People are working overtime, and they're as tired of dealing with customers as the customers are of shopping. Tip your baristas and servers, and when they ask how you're doing, maybe try genuinely asking how they're doing too! (And smile!)
Allison
Before I get into this, I want to remind you of the biggest thing: those people at the cash registers, folding clothes around the stores in the mall, helping you find the cream of tartar in the grocery store, and waiting your tables are PEOPLE. Wonderful, (mostly) hard-working people who are trying to earn money, and do their job well, and often with less than ideal hours.
Issue #1: Please and Thank You
Remember a long, long time ago, when your parents told you that they wouldn't pass you dessert at the table until you said please? And then when they served you, you had to say thank you? This is still totally in effect, even if you're in your 20s and 30s. That waiter who you just stopped to refill your water glass may actually be racing to get an order in for another table so they won't have to wait for an extra 5 minutes for their food. Smile, and say thank you when they bring stuff to you!
Issue #2: Patience
You walk into your favorite coffee shop, and see that the line is to the door. All of the staff is busting their rear ends to get everything done, which doesn't include just making coffee. They're ringing orders, cleaning the seating area, brewing coffee, dumping overflowing garbage cans, retrieving basic items like milk or syrups. People are racing through their orders at the cash register as though the poor person ringing should remember that they want three half-decaf, soy, no-foam, 16 ounce lattes, but make one with an extra shot, one with a pump of vanilla, and one only 165 degrees, EXACTLY.
Sometimes, things slip up. I'm never more appreciative than when customers see that things are crazy, and something slipped, and their drink ended up with whipped cream when they asked for none, and they're actually okay with it! Did you know that if you actually are nice to your barista/waiter/busser/etc. they'll most likely remember you, and therefore work even harder to be nice to you the next time? And if you're nasty, they'll never forget. And you'll probably go down on some list of people that the employee will cringe when they walk in.
Issue #3: Technology
As an owner of an iPhone, I understand the allure of smartphones. So much information at your fingertips! But when you're having a human interaction (ordering food, purchasing clothes, etc.), that little piece of technology needs to go away. Not maybe, not sometimes, but every time. Ordering food for a friend? Have them write down their order for you, and maybe some options in case they don't have what they want. Please don't stand there on the phone with them, discussing every option while you're at the head of the line making others wait and your server trying their hardest not to roll their eyes at you.
Issue #4: Large Parties
You know how a lot of restaurants automatically charge gratuities for parties of 8 or more? There is good reason. Working with a large party of people who all want exactly what they want, which probably won't at all coincide with what everyone else in the group wants, and can you split the check 5 ways, and do you mind if we pull up another table, and we need extra silverware...tip nicely, guys. Which leads me to:
Issue #5: Tipping
Did you know, in many states, servers are paid under minimum wage because their tips make up much of what they earn? Similarly, most servers and people who work in restaurants live more off of the tips they make than they do on their hourly wage. Also, in case you didn't realize, a base minimum tip should be 10% (based off of the amount your dinner cost after tax). Minimum. And that's only if they did a completely wretched job serving you. 10% tells your server that you have decency, but that they need to step up their work. 15% is good if they've done an okay job, but something may have been wrong, or service was slow. 20% should be what you aim to give. They're doing their very best, even in often less than ideal circumstances. Keep this in mind: much of the time, servers don't get to keep all of their tips. Tips can go into a pool with everyone else's tips, and you get the average based on how many hours you worked, or each server gets their own tips, but has to give a certain percentage of those away to their bussers and the kitchen staff. So if you tip 20%, the server may only get 10-15% of those tips.
And finally, I have a special note to those who stuck with me through this blog. Most of you know that I'm a Christian, and a young adult. I want to share with you something important: the two worst types of people for tipping fairly and treating people with respect and dignity are: Christians and young adults. And guys, this is a huge problem.
Think of it this way: You get done with church in the morning, and you and your friends decide to pop into a cafe to get some coffee and maybe a pastry. You're discussing the sermon when the server comes up (or when it's your turn to order), and you spend a while trying to figure out what to order, but instead of asking them to come back, they stand waiting patiently as each of you figure out what you want. (Doesn't seem like a big deal, right?) They bring back your food and coffee, but accidentally switch a plate or two. You sigh, roll your eyes, and switch them back in front of them, continuing your discussion which has now moved to what kind of worship music would have been appropriate for the service today. You forgot to say thank you, or even smile at your server. When they bring your check, you and your friends have to have it split up, so everyone is paying for their own meal. Only one person has cash, and some people have some coins, so altogether, you've left a $3 tip, mostly in change.
That server has been watching you, and listening. When I notice a customer is a Christian, I pay attention to how they act, and how they treat me. And you know that old proverb, "Actions speak louder than words?" It's completely true.
It's terrible to me that I cringe when I have to work Sunday mornings when we have what's called the "church rush." It makes me sad that people don't realize that their treatment of other people will have a huge impact on whether or not their server will ever want to step foot in their church. And by the way, just because I work Sunday mornings does not make me a heathen. I do it because I make money that way, and it fits my schedule.
So please, please be nice this holiday season. People are working overtime, and they're as tired of dealing with customers as the customers are of shopping. Tip your baristas and servers, and when they ask how you're doing, maybe try genuinely asking how they're doing too! (And smile!)
Allison
Thursday, December 6, 2012
Christmas is coming!
...and the goose is getting fat! Well, this goose isn't getting fat, but she is going to be working a lot for the next few weeks.
The quarter is SO close to being done. I have half of a class worth of theory II finals to grade as a favor to one of my professors (who is currently on a tour in Asia...so cool!), some grades to adjust and put into blackboard for aural skills, and then I'm free! It's been quite the whirlwind of a quarter, and I'm so glad it's over. The realization that I'm a third of the way through my senior year is a bit mind-boggling.
I've also realized that all of those post-college plans I've made for the last few years are basically void. I have absolutely no clue where I'm going to be going after college, or what's going to be happening. Heck, I'm not even sure what's going to be going on in February and March. This year is turning into a long-lasting lesson in living each day as it comes, and not worrying about tomorrow. I'll find out this month if I get to audition for grad schools, then I start buying airline tickets, fly out to different schools, then in March and April find out if I'm even going to get to go to grad school at all. It's incredibly nerve-wracking, and yet, I'm learning peace.
I'm definitely going to enjoy a few weeks away from school. I'm very glad to see that I'm getting to work a lot, though still only part-time, so I'll have plenty of time for making Christmas presents and practicing horn. I finished my shawl that I've been working on for the last few months while spending some time up in Snohomish hanging out with Jordon. Since he's stuck on the couch after an ankle surgery, I got to have plenty of time to work through the long process of binding off somewhere around 350 stitches (the longest part of any shawl, it seems) while he played some Halo.
I've already cast on my next project...my mom's Christmas present :) (Yes, Mom, you're finally getting something hand knit by me! I finally have enough confidence to make you something that I know you'll show off to your friends!) I already purchased a few other presents, and decided to be as simple for all of my family as possible with my Christmas list.
You ready for this extensive list? Here it is:
1. Money to go to paying for my new horn.
Yup, I know. It's huge! (Also, my inner English lover is cringing that I made a list with a 1. but no 2.) But, realistically, I don't need more stuff. I could really use help paying off my horn before I start purchasing plane tickets. Things are looking pretty positive financially right now, though I'm trying to keep living fairly frugally so things stay positive.
I'm very thankful right now for all of my friends who have stuck with me through all of the turmoil this quarter. It's been insane for everyone, and I'm kind of amazed how we all stayed together, even when half our time was spent biting each others' heads off. Overall, I think it turned out rather positively. I still have all my friends, including some of the more awesome best friends a girl could ever ask for. (You know who you are!)
Now I get to go head towards bed because I get to work tomorrow morning first thing! Working all the hours, bringing in all the money!
Allison
The quarter is SO close to being done. I have half of a class worth of theory II finals to grade as a favor to one of my professors (who is currently on a tour in Asia...so cool!), some grades to adjust and put into blackboard for aural skills, and then I'm free! It's been quite the whirlwind of a quarter, and I'm so glad it's over. The realization that I'm a third of the way through my senior year is a bit mind-boggling.
I've also realized that all of those post-college plans I've made for the last few years are basically void. I have absolutely no clue where I'm going to be going after college, or what's going to be happening. Heck, I'm not even sure what's going to be going on in February and March. This year is turning into a long-lasting lesson in living each day as it comes, and not worrying about tomorrow. I'll find out this month if I get to audition for grad schools, then I start buying airline tickets, fly out to different schools, then in March and April find out if I'm even going to get to go to grad school at all. It's incredibly nerve-wracking, and yet, I'm learning peace.
I'm definitely going to enjoy a few weeks away from school. I'm very glad to see that I'm getting to work a lot, though still only part-time, so I'll have plenty of time for making Christmas presents and practicing horn. I finished my shawl that I've been working on for the last few months while spending some time up in Snohomish hanging out with Jordon. Since he's stuck on the couch after an ankle surgery, I got to have plenty of time to work through the long process of binding off somewhere around 350 stitches (the longest part of any shawl, it seems) while he played some Halo.
I've already cast on my next project...my mom's Christmas present :) (Yes, Mom, you're finally getting something hand knit by me! I finally have enough confidence to make you something that I know you'll show off to your friends!) I already purchased a few other presents, and decided to be as simple for all of my family as possible with my Christmas list.
You ready for this extensive list? Here it is:
1. Money to go to paying for my new horn.
Yup, I know. It's huge! (Also, my inner English lover is cringing that I made a list with a 1. but no 2.) But, realistically, I don't need more stuff. I could really use help paying off my horn before I start purchasing plane tickets. Things are looking pretty positive financially right now, though I'm trying to keep living fairly frugally so things stay positive.
I'm very thankful right now for all of my friends who have stuck with me through all of the turmoil this quarter. It's been insane for everyone, and I'm kind of amazed how we all stayed together, even when half our time was spent biting each others' heads off. Overall, I think it turned out rather positively. I still have all my friends, including some of the more awesome best friends a girl could ever ask for. (You know who you are!)
Now I get to go head towards bed because I get to work tomorrow morning first thing! Working all the hours, bringing in all the money!
Allison
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