Breaking from the norms of society, and also 2016 in review

Today, I deactivated my Facebook account. Reasons include all the creepy tracking of my data, the weird desire to "facebook stalk" old colleagues and friends, the lack of actual content from my friends, plus being insanely sick of feeling inadequate compared to others around me. I still wasn't connected to anyone here in Boston, and I enjoy the fact that it meant I ask others what they did over the weekend because I didn't already see a status or a photo album about it. It also was contributing to homesickness because I could live my life in both places at once, which is just not a healthy thing to do. I want to move away from being like my same-generation peers in obsessively checking my phone. It's disturbing how often I opened the facebook app on my phone.

I think my next priority, once Chris has a job that doesn't involve us never seeing each other, will be to keep my phone stashed away in my bag all day. We used to live without being tethered to smart phones. Heck, smart phones weren't a thing 10 years ago. I'm so ready to try and be part of the physical world again. I realized a few days ago that the people who I consider to be my closest friends are the ones who take the time to call and catch up on a regular basis. They're the only ones I feel very connected to, especially since moving thousands of miles away from home.

On that note: 2016 in review!

What a year. Let's see...January wasn't super memorable off the top of my head. February was marked by my boss being let go, which meant that I had a ton of extra work, which meant I was extra stressed out. Therefore, I found a hobby: running! Spent February and March training to run the 10k in honor of the brand new 520 bridge spanning Lake Washington! Somewhere around April or May I got a minor promotion and title change at work, and was training towards doing a half marathon in July. In May I went for a long run from Redmond to Woodinville and back, and halfway home (around 6-7 miles into the run), my right foot started hurting so badly I couldn't walk on it and had to be rescued by one of my roommates. After a visit to an urgent care center, and a short stint with crutches, I was referred to a podiatrist who diagnosed that my right leg was slightly shorter than my left, and therefore the tendon that runs down the outside of my leg, under the arch of my foot, and connects by the big toe was inflamed by trying to stretch to be the same length. Got some super fancy custom orthotics (that were not covered by insurance. Boo.) and after a few weeks off from running as I broke them in, got the okay to ease back into exercise.

Well, I would have jumped back into exercising, but then I found a listing for a job just like mine, but at the Boston Symphony and, after discussing with Chris, applied for said job, hoping I might just get a phone interview or something. One phone interview, Skype interview, and in-person interview later, Chris and I found ourselves packing up our lives and driving across the country so I could start working at the BSO in late August. Whew!

I don't know how much detail I want to put into that drive across the country, but it was certainly the ordeal of the year. Two vehicles, two drivers, one trailer, two cats, all the stuff we could bring...not to mention the fact that we didn't know whether or not we would have an apartment when we got to Boston! We only really got the confirmation from our broker that we got the place when we were nearly in Massachusetts on the last day of driving. It took about two weeks to get my poor stomach back on track, between the poor travel diet and the stress. Chris and I agreed that if we ever have to move across the country again, we're shipping the important stuff, buying two plane tickets and flying with the cats wherever we need to go. Or maybe just driving in one car together. I'm sure it would have been way more pleasant if we weren't both driving the 3,500+ miles across the country effectively alone.

Let's see...after that whirlwind, we did our best to settle in (despite having basically no money), Chris found a job as a supervisor at the biggest Whole Foods in New England, though we hope that it's just a temporary job since A) we never see each other (he works evenings) and B) it would be great if he could get a nice office job that wouldn't put so much stress on his body. After being in the state about 4 weeks, having decided he would while we drove across the country, Chris proposed on September 18th, and I said yes! (No, we didn't make it facebook official. We chafed against that idea. And since only some family members and friends read my blog, I figure it's safe to share that here.) Plans are continuously changing, so no update there. I have NO idea what we're going to do exactly, but I already have my wedding dress, thanks to a coworker who just so happened to have a dress used in her husband's indie film that was almost perfectly in my size. (Being 5 feet tall, I'll of course have to hem the darn thing, but that's still less expensive than buying new!)

The last big news of the year is that we consolidated our two cars into one new-to-us car. Boston just isn't the kind of city where you should own two cars. Really, unless you commute out of town, you don't really need even one, but Chris needs it for work. It's a fantastic little Subaru Crosstrek, and bonus, it's lime green! And has heated seats. Which for some reason was the number one thing I wanted in a car after AWD.

We're not yet quite to the end of the year, but after a quiet Christmas with just the two of us, I'm looking forward to a quiet New Years, ushering in a new year and a new adventure! And who knows? Maybe a wedding too :)

~Allie

Finding healthy priorities

I've been pretty reclusive the past few months, so if you haven't seen much of me, it might come as a surprise that I've had a pretty unpleasant post-holiday period.

It won't take a lot of reflection and thought to come up with what was wrong. My work-life balance had gotten all out of whack, and it started draining on me, emotionally and physically. It's exhausting thinking about work all the time, and leading up to events I would find myself waking up for an hour at a time around 2 am worrying about some tiny detail.

Some of the stress was definitely caused by traffic nightmares. On a good day, my commute is a nice 45 minutes each direction, which is enough time to get some knitting in without getting cramps in my legs or a sore butt. However, a trend began this winter with our heavy rains: whenever it would rain, my commute would begin to lengthen horribly. One of the worst days was an 80-minute commute into work, followed by an 85-minute commute home. And, in case anyone was confused by the matter, having your commute compound in length whenever it rains is not something helpful when you live in and around Seattle. It has a tendency to rain often here in the winter.

I wish I could tell you all what the tipping point was. I remember there came a week where I hadn't knit at all because I was too stressed to even want to pull it out (which is odd, considering knitting is basically my yoga). I would spend my evenings tucked away back in my bedroom, away from everyone else in the apartment, likely with Kiva on my lap. I feel like the turning point may have been when I made the decision to pay to do a 10k in April (because why would I do a 5k first? That would be way too normal!), and therefore started running several times a week. It also may have been when the sun started actually being present when I would go out to catch the bus. (Yes, Mom, I have been using my sun lamp, but it's just no comparison to the real thing!)

The biggest shift has been a mental one. It's okay that my job is only part of my life 8 hours a day, 5 days a week. While some of my coworkers truly love living the job, it's healthier for me to focus on my hobbies and activities. It doesn't mean I don't like my job. On the contrary, I now like my job a lot better, because I'm not sitting at home focusing on the frustrating aspects.

I'm also back to knitting, and enjoying going for runs, and using the time to catch up with a couple long-distance friends too! It's easier getting my stuff done at work because I view it daily with fresh eyes, rather than having spent my free time worrying my way through every interaction and report.

I don't recommend living only for work. Somehow, it seemed like a much more bland and frankly, awful, experience than where I am now.